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Marty Feldman: Dead Cool
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Where has all the ugly gone? The Daily Beast’s Simon Doonan praises the Young Frankenstein star for his magnificent hideousness.
What happened to ugly? Where did all the Calibans and Quasimodos go? In our ultra-looksist culture, everyone has been systematically bewitched, buggered, and Botox’d into some annoying approximation of attractiveness-slash-hotness. There is no longer any room for those with sub-optimal looks. Sayonara, Sam Donaldson. Bonjour, Anderson Cooper.
I, for one, desperately miss the Peter Lorres, Charles Laughtons, and Margaret Hamiltons. And I really, really, really miss that super-cool, ugly bastard Marty Feldman!
Marty Feldman’s face was a horrible example of what can happen when a thyroid complaint, a dash of botched surgery, a car crash, and endless rounds of nose-mangling pugilism all converge on one human being. The result? A work of masterful hideousness.
Marty Feldman’s face was a horrible example of what can happen when a thyroid complaint, a dash of botched surgery, a car crash, and endless rounds of nose-mangling pugilism all converge on one human being.
Marty’s visage was seen at its best in Mel Brooks' 1974 cult classic Young Frankenstein. Playing the hunchbacked Igor—pronounced “Eye-gore”—Marty is clearly having a ball. During filming, he is alleged to have kept himself amused by moving his hump (a prop pregnancy pad) to random spots on his back and waiting to see if anyone noticed. His finest moment comes when Dr. Frankenstein (Gene Wilder) yells, "Damn your eyes!" Feldman stares cheekily into the camera, smiles coquettishly and says, "Too late!"
Marty said: “Money can't buy poverty.”
Marty was born poor working class and Jewish in England in 1933. Unsurprisingly, his first job entailed scampering around the Dreamland Fun Fairground at the seaside town of Margate.
Marty said: “The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.”
Somehow he managed to blunder and claw his way into a career as a comedy writer. Here he found his true métier. His surreal anarchic wit inspired the subsequent scribblings of the Monty Python Crew. A prolific collaborator, he penned, amongst many other shows, the legendary and outrageously homo-hilarious Julian and Sandy skits for the radio show Round the Horne.
Marty said: “Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act.”
Though he had a genuine empathy with the marginalized freaks of the world, Marty was ferociously straight bloke. In 1959 he married the love of his life, a dolly bird named Lauretta Sullivan. They lived for many years in a gothic creepy Victorian pile in Hampstead which now belongs to Boy George.
By the mid-'70s, Marty had won BAFTAs and become a comedic star in the U.K. Like many Brit wits before him, Marty set his sights on the U.S. His Hollywood assault was only partially successful: He lensed a bunch of movies—Silent Movie and The Last Remake of Beau Geste being the most notable—but it never quite clicked. Marty was too witty and too ugly for Tinseltown. Six packs of fags a day finally took their toll and Marty died of a heart attack at the age of 49 while filming in Mexico.
Let’s take a breather from our relentless focus on cuteness and hotness and remember the majesty of Marty’s mangled physiognomy. Marty was cool because he took his hideousness and, with a brilliant wit and oodles of self-knowledge, he flaunted it. He waved it at us, daring us to recoil and challenging our prosaic pre-conceived ideas about beauty.
John Talks Joe
Lloyd Grove is editor at large for The Daily Beast. He is also a frequent contributor to New York magazine and was a contributing editor for Condé Nast Portfolio. He wrote a gossip column for the New York Daily News from 2003 to 2006. Prior to that, he wrote the Reliable Source column for the Washington Post, where he spent 23 years covering politics, the media, and other subjects.
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Writer, fashion commentator and window-dresser, Simon Doonan, is known for his provocative "Simon Says" column in the New York Observer. He has written four books: Confessions of a Window Dresser, Wacky Chicks, a memoir entitled Nasty and a tongue-in-cheek style guide entitled Eccentric Glamour to be published in paperback in mid-April. Nasty is to be re-released as Beautiful People. A comedy TV series entitled Beautiful People, produced by Jon Plowman, will debut on LOGO in May.
Marty you were the man. I laughed for years watching you.
Marty was one funny SOB. Talent like his comes along far too infrequently
True character has disappeared in Hollywood replaced by manufactured "cloned" perfect body and face celebrities.
Sad state of affairs if you ask me.
We miss you Marty.
Funny, I never thought of Marty as being ugly. He was just Marty, a force of his own personality. Maybe it's not that we have too much physical perfection today, it's that we have too little personality.
I totally agree!
I can't help breaking up when ever I hear, "walk this way", picturing Marty (Igor) shuffling with his hump swaying in Mel Brooks' masterpiece Young Frankenstein.
Thanks for the memories, Crazy Feldman :)
Whenever something bad happens I try remember Marty and Gene Wilder; the graveyard scene in Young Frankensten and Marty's line...'could be worse, could be raining!' It brings a smile and puts things into perspective. Another great memory from a great movie!
I agree, that was his best movie. Although, one of his early movies, In God We Trust, or Give Me That Prime Time Religion, was a classic, especially with all the future stars (mostly "ugly" character actors who had to rely on talent) in it. Sadly, it cannot be had on DVD. Then, when he was at the morgue singing, "I ain't got no body...".
So, Steve Buscemi is Hollywood Handsome?
I love these weep n' wail stories, and the following posts, about how the Golden Days of film are far behind us, usually built on a foundation of dreamy nostalgia and selective memory. Excuse me if I don't shed the crocotears. MF was great (particularly in Young Frankenstein, Brooks' best film by far) but there's a steady trail of wonderful character actors who've preceded, and followed him. Or maybe you think Tex Cobb is fighting for the same jobs as Pitt and Clooney. Praise the man, but don't bury his movie kin-it's going to be okay folks.
How funny that a man who looks like a botoxed, blow dried fake tanned male Barbie writes in praise of Mr. Feldman and the other "ugly" actors. While I think Simon's heart is in the right place, people like Lorre, Bogart, Feldman, etc. aren't "ugly." They have intriguing looks, for sure, and we certainly do need more of their ilk in entertainment, but don't call them "ugly." And that poem at the end? WTF?
Many Feldman lines were pure Groucho: In Frankenstein, Wilder, arriving at the castle accompanied by Madeleine Kahn and Teri Garr, says to Feldman: Igor, help me with the baggage. Igor replies: You take the blonde, I'll take the brunette. As well as co-writing many British radio and television shows, Feldman also had his own show on British tv in the late 60s with remarkably original sketches, parodies. Not sure whether these were seen in the US. If not, a pity for Feldman fans.
"Abbie Normal"
It broke me up!!
Someone help me out here. As a kid I can remember watching a Marty Feldman sketch comedy show, a less bawdy and more physical comedy version of Benny Hill in the early 70's. Anybody know if there are copies of that floating around?
One of his best lines I remember too well was at the Academy Awards: upon reaching the podium, he flashes his big smile at the obviously giggling audience and announces, "May I remind you that I was also created in the image and likeness of God!" And after the gales of laughter, he snapped, "You see, He has a sense of humor".
Marty was priceless as 'Eye-gore' in Young Frankenstein. I agree, his comedy was very much like a British Groucho Marx. I'm glad Mr. Doonan bothered to take the time to write about a largely forgotten and, at least here in the States, rather obscure comedian. We could use a lot more of that. It truly gets old, getting constantly bombarded with the same old ADD celebrity worship of the latest sensation.
As for celebrities being homogeneously "beautiful" while less glamorous actors are passed over, there is certainly some truth to this. But then, there has been a whole new genre of movies over the past several years where plain, uninteresting, unattractive everymen are the heroes of the story.
Let's also not gloss-over the fact that some actors have put on weight to appear more ordinary for their roles (George Clooney in Syriana, Denzel Washington in Taking Pelham 123, Sylvester Stalone in Copland).
When pining over the past I like to remind folks to consider the words of Billy Joel, "The good ol' days weren't always good, and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems."
By the way, I found the line about the "Six packs of fags a day" interesting. In spite of not being British I knew exactly what "fags" meant. Naturally. And in spite of being a homosexual, I'm not the least bit offended at it's usage.
I mention this because I was glad to see that political correctness did not cause the article to be censored, and/or to see that it didn't lead Mr. Doonan to censor himself.
As someone who has done a fair amount of research on Feldman and written a few pieces about him, I found this article very interesting.
I'm glad to agree with a lot of the comments that essentially stated Feldman wasn't ugly, he just...was. From a woman's perspective, I personally think he was very attractive, but that's beside the point.
What I like is the general question this article poses: "where HAS all the ugly gone?" I use the term ugly in this context to mean "unconventional," mostly, not hideous. We've become a society where people are not trying to look better or more beautiful so much as they are just trying to look "similar." This makes things very boring. Particularly when you look at the stars of today. There are very few people who look, for lack of a better term, unique, as far as I'm concerned. Adrien Brody is one of the only actors I can think of who is very fascinating looking.
Sadly, I think it's partly a time period thing. When you look at the era that Feldman came up in, this 1960s, 1970s period, you'll find he wasn't the only unconventional looking person. I mean this was a time where the Woody Allens and Gene Wilders of the world were also coming up. They're real looking guys too. Women too, it seemed were allowed to be genuine looking.
It's hard when life becomes like some sort of "Twilight Zone" episode. People need to remember that the airbrush doesn't only remove the blemishes; it can also stamp out originality.
Skot01 - yes!
any time i see an article or a remembrance of marty feldman i always think of that same 70s series on TV. it was HILARIOUS. or, was it part of another show? i simply can't recall.
though sketchy in my memory, i loved a long bit he did - i think he told the "wife" he was going "out" to run an errand or to pick up a loaf of bread or something like that. what followed was a series of bits showing marty going across the continents using various modes of transportation, and then finally returning home. i'd love to see that again!
i couldn't believe it when he died; just a terrible loss for the laughs he could have brought to the world for many years to come.
I had no idea Marty Feldman contributed to the immortal "Julian and Sandy" Thanks Simon!
Marty Feldman was simply great. Eye-gore, the ever shifting hump, "Abby Normal", the man was classic comedy.
I was a kid when Feldman's movies came out, and even then I thought he was hilarious. I'd go so far as to say he was a unique talent. Doonan's thesis is a false one because Hollywood has always tried to create glamor and employed great looking performers to do so. The difference between the present and past is that now there are more resources for performers to conform to the Hollywood template of beauty.
It's worth noting, however, that good looks are punished too. Kicole Kidman had to wear a prosthetic nose to win an Oscar, Charlize Theron needed to gain twenty pounds, shave her eyebrows, and wear false teeth. On the other hand, Frances McDormand has won. Meryl Streep has been nominated more than a dozen times and won twice. The latter performers are attractive, but hardly striking. Marlon Brando didn't win an award until he was no longer a sex symbol.
Doonan is mistaken for wanting to see a return to a time when ugly actors were accepted. The unattractive performers who made names for themselves did so through unsinkable talent, drive, and distinction. Hollywood couldn't find another Marty Feldman if all the agents in L.A. tried, because there's only one.
Forget ugly, I would just settle for anything relevant coming out of Hollywood these days. I am not trying to minimalize them but waxing poetic about the old days is easy. Every generation has its era but I swear these last three with a few exceptions leave alot to be desired. Another one of Mel Brooks' masterpieces was Blazing Saddles. And Madelyn Kahn was so sexy.
Thank you.
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